Saturday, February 2, 2008

What you don't know...

Before I had Tee, I was so worried about how in the world I was going to handle teenagers. A precious friend reminded me that they don't come out teenagers, they come out little babies and you have years to gain the wisdom to handle the teenage years...except when their parents are addicts and abusive...then, they come into your home as teenagers and bring MySpace, Playstation 2, and laundry that looks like your husband's.
I am ill equipped and feel a little overwhelmed. I'm finding that there are things I can say to my own boys that I cannot say to these young men. They need man to man talks and wisdom that I cannot offer.
I feel a little like Martha but want to be Mary too, and don't know how to sit with them and talk about things I know very little about.
It's been easy for me to love the little kids that come to our house because they need hugs and kisses, popsicles and grilled cheese sandwiches. They need to learn how to share and be respectful and learn about who Jesus is and what he came to do for them.
These boys are already kind and respectful. They already share. They know who Jesus is and are learning more and more about what they've been called to be as they walk with Him. What they need is direction and lessons on making choices that are bigger than whether or not to hit back or use potty language.
I'm praying that Trey will have an added measure of time and energy for these boys as they need his counsel, and I'm praying for wisdom beyond my 29 years.

Oh, give me a break. I'm having a hard day.


MissHannah said...

Oh, you are a much wiser 29 year old than I am.

Last weekend after the big Lily and Q blow up I watched you lovingly go and sit in the dark with Lily. You were just what she needed in all the chaos...and you are just what the boys need in all their chaos.

I'll be praying for Trey, but you too. Boys (young men) need a mama, especially one like you.

Candy said...

Cannot agree more with Hannah. They need nurture and that you are giving them. They need to learn respect for women, you can teach them that. I will pray for added one-on-one with Trey. And I will pray that when you're feeling overwhelmed that you decide quickly to flee again to your only source of grace and help in that time of need... the throne of grace. And may you find it sufficient for your every moment.
I love you!

Candy said...
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THESE 3 KINGS said...

Mel, hang in there..I understand the feeling of not knowing what to do or how withstand these difficult circumstances.. I would like to share with you something I just read...
Mark 14:8.."she did what she could. She poured perfume on my body beforehand to prepare for my burial".. Burdens like this can sap your strength and leave a shadow of darkness across your life..(and even bring you to anxiety/ feeling overwhelmed)
A woman broke an alabaster jar of expensive perfume and poured it over the head of Jesus..Some criticized her for wasting what could have been sold to provide money for ministry. But Jesus KNEW that she was honoring Him. His words in Mark 14:8 are precious..she did what she COULD...Mel, continue to rejoice in that you are God's child..Continue to thank him for the opportunities that you have to invest in lives and to nurture the NEXT generation. WE as ministry wives or christians for that matter.. don't have to face life's challenges alone..all WE are called to do is simply WHAT WE CAN, WITH WHAT WE HAVE, WHILE WE CAN, WHERE WE ARE AND THEN LEAVE THE RESULTS UP TO HIM..all you can do is pray for wisdom and do the NEXT BEST THING....Oh sista!!! this leaves us with freedom to serve the way HE wants us to.. you face those lies with TRUTH and watch PERFECT love cast out ALL feelings of overwhelmingness(fear) wait... is that a word??

Take you circumstances ONE DAY at a TIME and find a PROMISE and stand on it ...I will be praying for you..GOd is your strength, you be encouraged in your weakness, thats where you will find HE is STRONG!!
holla at cha girl

Abbie said...

I'm going to pray that you realize that just simply being an incredible source of love in your home is what they are seeing in you Melissa. Just purely accepting them for who they are has already given them more than they've probably had in their lifetimes. You are blessed woman, and loved loads and loads.

JB said...

I would have guessed not a day over 28! :) So good to see you the other day! We def. need to have a Dtown sleep over!!!

Holli said...

I will be praying! Teenage kids..... I needed the reminder today to appreciate my toddler and how it is "easy" to wipe noses, kiss ouches and deal with a screaming, tantrum throwing, hitting -almost two year old.:) We had visitors this weekend and they have NO kids and well I think we cured the desire to ever want them. :)