Thursday, May 15, 2008

Why my house isn't clean.

I'm an exerciser. Not necessarily the "did and IronMan" kind of exerciser like my Tee's stud teacher Roni, but an exerciser all the same. There is something wonderful about getting up before dawn and having some time to get my thoughts together and blood pumping before entering the busyness of life. Odd as it may sound, I feel like the hour I spend helps me to be a better wife, mother, and friend.

I've been going to the YMCA every morning at 5:45 with Hannah. Dea and Darius have amazingly and voluntarily gotten up with me each morning to play basketball in the gym while I'm working out. For 14 and 17 year old boys who could definitely sleep in a little, it's impressed me beyond belief. I'm hoping they're learning a kind of discipline that will serve them their whole lives.

On Friday's, my little boys like to get up as well and shoot hoops with their new big brothers. It's pretty cute.

Darius plays a lot of basketball in addition to his early mornings and has been complaining of sore muscles. The other night he said, "Mama Melissa, could you get me some Epsom Salt next time you go to the store?"

I giggled.

"Darius, what in the world are you going to use Epsom Salt for?"

"I'm gonna soak in it. It helps your muscles relax."

This time, I laughed out loud.

"Oh, Honey! You sound like you're 80!"

He insisted, so yesterday at the store I picked up some good old fashioned Epsom Salt for that boy. It was $1.86 so I figured I had minimal financial risk.

When Darius got home from basketball and saw that carton sitting on the counter, he jumped for joy and practically ran to the bathtub. About 30 minutes later he came out beaming saying he felt like a million bucks. I teased him a little but deep down wondered if the stuff really did work.

You see, yesterday morning, Hannah made me do 4,786 walking lunges and I was so sore this morning I could barely walk. (I don't know what I did to her but if she's reading this, Hannah, I'm so so very sorry. Please forgive me and don't ever make me do those again. Well, until tomorrow morning and then make me do 4,787. Thank you.)

So a while ago, I tiptoed into the boys' bathroom and under the sink found that big carton of Epsom Salt. Now, they weren't home to see me but the shame I felt was enough to make me sneak. I poured and poured that manna from heaven into a hot bath and I'm a big liar if I don't admit I feel tons better. I can actually sit down to write this without tears rolling down my face and can get up without help. But, before I would eat a big slice of humble pie a la mode, I had to find out for myself if there was any truth to the whole 'Epsom Salt helps sore muscles' folklore.

I spent the better part of the morning delving into the vast ocean of information that is Epsom Salt. Why? I have no idea. Maybe it's the rebellious child in me just wanting it to be summer. Maybe it's my passive aggressive way of not cleaning my very dirty house. And maybe I just long for knowledge on a variety of subjects. Ok, no. It's for sure not that.

After my extensive research on Google,(does that qualify?) I decided to go with Wikipedia's description which stated "Magnesium sulfate (Epsom Salt) when used through soaking, can soothe muscle pains..." because in the words of my good friend Michael Scott -
“Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world, can write anything they want about any subject. So you know you are getting the best possible information.”

The very best.

Darius, I owe you an apology. And a new thing of Epsom Salt. I used all of your's.


Candy said...

You failed to include that it was your ancient mother-in-law who directed you out of the spices and into the first-aid section at Target to even find the epsom salts; which proves it isn't an "old wives' tale" but an old mother-in-law tale which is actually TRUE!
Great blog!
P.S. Bill knows how I love being first to comment!!!

Robin said...

Shoot! I NEED for that to be the reason my house isn't clean!!

Funny, I associate Epsom Salt with my grandmother, but I'm not sure why; my dad always soaked his feet in it, too, to soften his nails before cutting (tmi?) :). Some very sweet about a TEEN using it for "medicinal purposes" :).

Ooooo, and I've visited your blog several time over the past several days after reading your TITLE at the Blogged-in Network. I was a Theta a thousand years ago (Clemson, Delta Phi) and I got a kick out of the title. I guess Theta IS for a lifetime ;).

~ Robin

MissHannah said...

I love Epsom salt, my dear friend Hattie introduced me after she ran in the white rock marathon.

Also according to my friend Emily if you have a particularly sore area you can put some ES on a hot washcloth and wrap it around the sore spot...I guess I (we) would need a bath towel to soak our backsides.

Tomorrow we do 5, ready.

jay n tricia said...

Just saw this shirt yesterday... for some reason, it came to mind when I read your post.

-- Jay

Daisy Girl said...

That is so funny! I'll have to try me some epsom salt!

So did I miss the post about how the boys came to be living with your family?

Since I'm just a virtual friend and I don't actually know you, I was just curious.


These Three Kings said...

oh yea... I love me some epsom salt.. that was my best friend after after giving birth..

enjoy my friend!

DidiLyn said...

Seriously. Who knew?

Mel's World said...


First, I had to say that I had to come visit when I saw your post on Missy's meeting other Melissa's...Ha!

Second, yep, we bought into the whole Epsom Salt thing ourselves years ago when the pediatrician said it would help our boys (now 12 and 14) relax their muscles after playing sports. It worked and we bought into it! Now we have a bag of Epsom Salt in their bathroom for whenever they might need it!

I'm with you...I would HAVE to search out the information BEFORE I cleaned my house too!

Nice to meet ya!
Melissa in Mel's World