With Sadie out of town, Tee at a birthday party, Dea and Darius playing basketball for hours on end, Trey and Graham having a Dude's Night Out at Bass Pro, my beautiful girl, Olivia, and I were left with a night all to ourselves.
With a little brother coming just thirteen months behind her, sometimes I get the feeling she got pushed off my lap a little too soon. When we can, we try to get some time together to catch up, and do what girls like to do. Eat and watch High School Musical 3.
We had such a great time, I found out all the deep dark secrets of the playground, her Littlest Pet Shop Journal, and who she square danced with at Living History Day. It's what I love about having girls; they'll actually give you information instead of the cursory, "Grunt. I don't know. Grunt. Feed me."
Dinner was great and the movie was so fun to watch with Olivia dancing in her seat next to me. I know, I know, you've all seen it and have been singing the songs in the shower for weeks. We're a little slow at the Hill house because, unless we want to take out a second mortgage, we can only see movies in the "big theater", as we like to call it, in groups of two. We usually wait until they hit the Dollar Theater before we take the whole gang.
Whilst in the theater (practicing my King James English for you), I was tempted, as I often am, to buy the biggest, butteryest, box of movie popcorn they had. Something, though, was wrong. I looked at that normally tantalizing, orangy-yellow popcorn and wanted it not.
What was wrong with me? Something has died inside of me and I must find out the cause.
About a third of the way into Troy's fourth song; so about three minutes into the movie, it came to me.
I'm calling it, Ruined Me Forever on Other Popcorn, Popcorn.
My friend Jody gave me this recipe and it is so easy and delightful I just have to share it with the rest of the world. Or, you two.
Best of all, you probably have all the ingredients right in your house except for the popcorn kernels that come in a bag and not that, gasp, microwave kind. You need the real, old-fashioned kind that are on the very top shelf of your grocery store, right next to the fat free beef jerky.
It's sweet, it's salty, it's crunchy and perfect for all the football games your bound to watch this weekend but, beware, it may ruin you on all other popcorn. Forever.
If you can handle that, let's get to whippin' up this bad boy!
First, you take a big stock pot, like the kind you make a hearty winter's stew in and put that baby on your stove.
Pour in 1/4 cup of corn oil. It tastes the best but in a pinch, of if you're just passive aggressive, you can use vegetable. I have so that should tell you something.
Next, turn your burner up to about mid-mid-high. About 6 and 1/2 on a heat scale of 1-10. I know this is a lot of numbers but put away your calculators and bear with me.
Pour in 1/2 cup of kernels and wait.
Wait for it...
That's it! That's what I'm talking about! When a few of the kernels start popping, sprinkle 1/4 cup of sugar over the kernels and close that lid. You need to do this fast or the popping corn might fly up and hit you in the eye and my insurance won't cover that. Now, with your lid tightly on, get in touch with your great-great ancestors who did not have microwave popcorn, and shake that pot back and forth.
You may not hear anything for a second because the sugar will temporarily cool down the oil but don't open the lid. Whatever. You. Do.
Keep shaking and soon you'll hear the delightful sound of popping. When it dies down to a second between pops, quickly dump that sweet, crunchy goodness into a big bowl before the sugar burns and it makes you cry.
Now, take about a teaspoon of Kosher Salt and sprinkle it all over your heavenly snack. Again, you can go getting all passive aggressive on me and use table salt, but don't.
Toss the popcorn to distribute all the salt and serve.
I always have little vultures waiting to get the first bite.
How 'bout taking some human bites, Darius?