Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Haircut Day.

In Graham's stocking for Christmas this year, he got this book.

It was very appropriate of Santa to bring it because there's really no three words that send Graham into hysterics quite like, "Buddy, it's time for a haircut."

You just counted the words, didn't you? Six, not three. I know. Remember, no habla mathpanol. Si, burrito.

Yesterday, on the way home from school, I uttered those words. I warned the other children first to cover their ears. Graham literally threw himself on the ground and wailed. Almost as if his arm was being sawed off. With a butter knife.

He cried so hard, I thought he was going to pop a vessel. All because scissors were going to come in contact with his hair.

Is he Samson? Pretty sure he's not. Is he afraid his strength will leave his body if his hair is cut? Possibly.

It didn't help that, after we'd actually gotten the haircut, he was helping me carry a gallon of milk but accidentally dropped it. A gallon of milk makes a big, big mess. It also doesn't help support my claim that he will still be strong and handsome, even with a haircut.

We don't know where he got this absurd notion that haircuts could make or break his whole look. Perhaps, he's spent a little too much time looking at my high school yearbooks. They could be a case study in bad hair and may have scarred him a little.

Anyway, after some bribing, mostly consisting of an all access pass on the Wii last night, he conceded and submitted to the shears.

He looks great and I'd love to show you a picture but he's still unwilling to document his nightmare. His one-half-inch nightmare.

This morning, as I was packing his lunch in anticipation of his long day worrying about his haircut, I gave him the last pack of Nacho Cheese Doritos as somewhat of a consolation prize. The other two got Cheetos.

Now, this brings me to another puzzling issue in our house.

When did Cheetos become the low man on the chip totem pole? My kids would rather have basically anything other than Cheetos. Really? Pretzels? Yes, pretzels and plain Ruffles have moved up the ladder, passing Cheetos in my childrens' chip hierarchy.

Because I refuse to waste perfectly good processed cheese, I've found myself selflessly eating the kids' castaways. I've found them to be an excellent source of energy; especially the energy needed to handle haircut day.


Elizabeth Lyons said...

I continue to simply adore your posts. For the record, you are more than welcome to toss any castaway Cheetos my way. I love them. Not the spicy ones. Just the good old-fashioned processed cheese ones that leave my fingers orange for a week.


Jen said...

I love Cheetos! :)

lmerie said...

HeHe, I have a 12 year old who would rather not have his hair cut too! I told him between March and July he could wear his hair however he see fit, but for now, I have a say during school!

D'Lyn said...

I'm a huge fan of Cheetos and seem to have put on a few pounds "absorbing" the packages that no one in my household will eat. I'm right there with ya!

emily said...

I bet Grahammy looks great!! He and Wick have that haircut aversion in common.

Save me some Cheetos please. :)

Christy@pipandsqueak said...

My current favorite chip is the natural cheetos. They are actually organic. It seems like an oxymoron but it is true!

Mrs. Troop said...

I've missed a lot around here! You've been dealing with boys and hair and Cheetos and cute earrings and I didn't even know. :-)
Praying for you all - that God will give His wisdom.
Sorry the Cheetos are out of favor. About 1/2 of my kids love them. The other 1/2 fight for the Doritos.
Our Christmas had some unexpected circumstances, as well. Life tends to be that way. Now, if only I could respond right regardless!

Susan said...

I get the same reaction from Ella when I tell her that it's time to cut her toenails...it creeps her out and she wails and bawls. I'm with you sister on bribery! My grandma used to bribe me WITH cheetos...don't understand your children!!
Hope to see you all soon!

The 5 Bickies said...

Cheetos are at the top of the pecking order around here. I'll trade my wavy chips for your cheetos.

Kim said...

This was a great post!
You can send all unwanted Cheetos my way. I HEART Cheetos! Especially the crunchy ones which, of course, we can't get here.

Pam from alertandorientedx4 said...

I love reading your blog! Cheetos are my husband's equivalent to crack. For me it's limon Lays. My kids prefer Funyuns or Flamin' Hot Cheetos. And they are big...like 12, 14, 16 and 18. And yes, haircuts are still traumatic.
I feel your pain...

Hauswife said...

Haha! Love it. And, what the deal with the Cheetos. My kids have scorned them as well. Heck, man, if I could eat them without gaining 1 lb. per Cheeto oz. consumed, I'd scarf them every day. Weird kids.