Monday, May 4, 2009

Oh, this bleeding heart.

Often, emotions trump logic. I find this happening to me over and over again - almost like a bad scene in Groundhog Day.

As we were driving home the other day, we almost ran over, and therefore felt obliged to pick up, take home, bathe, and feed this...

My kids called it ARK as in Almost Road Kill.

He lasted for about 45 minutes until my children became engrossed in an episode of Spongebob Squarepants and he escaped through a hole in our fence. I think he'd had enough of Sadie trying to clean his shell with a sponge and Bath and Body Works Ginger Body Scrub and decided to get the heck outta dodge.

The kids were watching Spongebob as part of our research on the various trends and societal impact of such cartoons on our nation's youth. Over the summer, my children will be writing a thesis, composing a power point presentation, and then presenting their findings to the entire family. For a grade.

Or, I was trying to cook dinner and needed them to be occupied to the point of comatose. Either one.

While making dinner, Hannah stopped by. She seemed amused that I was doing this...

Amused enough to take 27 photographs with my camera.

One of our Betta fish, no name, apparently has an issue with his swim bladder. I know this because I Googled it so the information I found was tantamount to the gospel.

He/she/it only swims sideways and floats to the top.

Google said it's constipated. The cure for Betta fish constipation is fasting it for two days and then feeding it a cooked shelled pea. Unfortunately, the pea sinks and the fish can only float so I have to feed it with my hand. It's no problem because I really don't have anything else to do.

So far, nothing but a happy, floating Betta fish. I would put it out of it's misery with one flush but Google also said it's totally painless, just annoying to the fish.

Unlike my trainer on Wii Fit. He's both annoying and painful.



16 comments:

The B Family said...

Ha! We've laughed for years about my sister feeding a green pea to her goldfish--must have ended up on the same internet site as you. But it worked--her fish went from practically floating at the top of the water to living on about 3 years after that. At some point, his name changed from Goldie to Methuselah.
Christina

Henley on the Horn said...

I mean, you are so funny. Thank you for the dose of laughter! Don't those beta fish attack? I don't think I'd be sticking my hand in those murky waters... I'm just sayin'....

Amy Beth @ Ministry So Fabulous! said...

You know, any person who feeds a cooked, shelled pea to a fish is a really, really good person. I'm just sayin'.

Traci@TotalMomsense said...

Okay- so much funnier than G telling dirty jokes at the dinner table. A pea? Seriously? How on earth did you find that?

emily said...

That is good stuff to start the morning- got in really late last night and my head is fuzzy, but I'm pretty sure you are hand-feeding a fish.

Audrey said...

Oh my gosh - so funny! Thanks for the great laugh!!

Casey said...

A constipated fish?!?! You are a good mom.

Christy@pipandsqueak said...

Is your fish in a wine glass?

Holli said...

I prayed for a mom like you.... I did talk her into a couple rabbits, a iguana, a turtle and a dog that is still theirs. I guess you are a lot like my mom- a sucker for kids with puppy pleading eyes "can we keep it." and for the four legged friends!

hannahgarippa said...

I need to stop by more often so that the blog world can see more of the crazy things you do...

Love you and your bleeding heart...

Sue said...

It's like Wild Kingdom in your blog today! I am amazed at all the things I learned. Don't wash a turtle with Bath & Body Works scrub or he'll high tail it away... hand feed your fish to help constipation. Can't wait until the next post! ;-)

happygeek said...

I'm with AB. You are a good, good woman.

Sitesx6 said...

Oh how I love you for saving the turtle from death.

I have risked my life MANY times (and the lives of my children) to stop the car in busy traffic to rescue turtles on the road. I just get out of the car-halt traffic and move the turtle to the weeds or safely on the side of the road in the direction he was going.

Once I halted traffic on a VERY BUSY road to assist a baby bird that was in the road.

I'm sure all of the animal friends I have rescued over the years will be waiting in my mansion in heaven when I arrive. You will have a FULL HOUSE up there too. :)

However-I might be in trouble for the time I FLUSHED the sea monkeys....sorry God!

Good job.

Jess said...

Hahahahahahaha! That's all I can say! Can't stop laughing!

Anonymous said...

I have to admit, my first thought was that the fish was swimming sideways because it was tipsy from swimming in your wine. Hee hee. I wonder, would the shelled pea treatment work for people who can only swim the sidestroke? AileenG

Sarah said...

You are a bleeding heart! I would have set the disabled fish free in the sewer system, and moved on to my new Betta. :-)

And I am glad I am not the only mother who lets her children "do research" while I make supper.....lol