After finding out that we had a snake loose in the house, many of you had various suggestions for me. Most of them involved moving, selling the house and moving, relocating, or moving as soon as possible.
So, what you're saying is, having a snake loose in the house is not a good thing?
I couldn't agree more. It's also made me think about the ramifications of actually having to put the house on the market and sell it.
We have a few drawbacks, let me just name a few.
1. The economy no es bueno. Houses are being foreclosed upon at an alarming rate. The bank officers have pitched a tent and have Pizza Hut delivered every other night. Oh, who am I kidding, Pizza Hut won't deliver in my neighborhood. When I call and give them my address, they say, "Are you in the neighborhood on the other side of I-30?"
"Yes. It's like 1/2 a mile from you. "
"Oh, um, yeah, we can't come over to that neighborhood because, you know, we're afraid we might die. Try Dominoes. They're crazy at Dominoes."
2. Like a water leak, termites, and black mold, I'm pretty sure I'd be obligated to put, "Snake loose in the house." on the disclosure statement. From the sounds of ya'll, and the look on Dea's face when we told him Julius was on the lamb, it would be a deal-killer for about 95% of our potential buyers.
Also, I may or may not owe my marriage to a snake.
When Trey was in college, he, too, had a pet snake. It is just one more of the reasons I'm pretty sure we wouldn't have dated in college but, that's not important right now.
His snake had disappeared and been missing for about three weeks. He was sure Caleb, the apparently very biblical snake, was dead. Then one night, as he was taking some hussy (I actually think she was like Miss Texas or something like that. Whatever.) out on a date, he opened his car door for her and there, curled up on the passenger seat was Caleb, healthy and good as ever.
Trey was so excited he kind of ignored the now screaming and hysterical girl to embrace his long lost pet. She refused to go out with him again, leaving him single, which resulted in his move to Dallas where we met, got married, and lived almost happily ever after.
See, lemonade from lemons, people. Lemonade from lemons.
Now, this doesn't mean I'm not tearing the house apart looking for the thing. Someone suggested I put out something for bait, you know, to attract Julius.
Hmmm. What do I have that is horrible, causes angst, and can be incredibly painful?
How 'bout this? Their names are eerily close.
I think it will totally work.
Ya'll have a great weekend!