Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Santa hates me.

Despite heavy security (not really), a dog, and a friend who was staying at the house while we were gone, Santa somehow found a way into our home.

It made our 1:00 a.m. arrival on Sunday night...loud.

Each child received one gift from the man in red and Olivia somehow, apparently through some sort of Clause mind control, got just what she'd been asking for all year.

Her gift came in the form of a note...

Merry Christmas Olivia,
I have made arrangements for you to pick out a Ball Python from Petland when you return. (Snakes make the reindeer a little jumpy.) I hope you had a good time skiing in Colorado.

Two things. 1. Who cares about the reindeer, what about the Momma? 2. What about the 'nothing else living in our house that poops' rule?


So, now, friends, we need some help.

For the life of her, Olivia can't figure out what to name her newest snuggly-bug of a pet.

We'd love any suggestions you might have.

For the record, the other pets in our house are named after literary characters because it somehow takes away some of the crazy factor.

This one's a boy.

In preparation for next year, I'm planning on feeding the snake progressively larger mice dressed in Santa suits.

Lemonade from lemons, people, lemonade from lemons.


chrys said...

Rudyard Kipling thought Kaa was a perfect name for a python. The Disney version made him rather villainous with those awful hypnotic eyes, though. So maybe not such a great pet name after all. :)


Holli said...

my son asked for a hamster and santa got him a zhu zhu. Santa likes us BETTER HA HA!!!
I would call it Bo.

Tricia said...

ok, so...can my husband come live at your house please?? i know, I know...things are probably a BIT cozy already at your place given the 6 children, 2 dogs, new gerbil, etc etc etc....BUT! Jay has been begging for a snake FOREVER. And I have stubbornly resisted, with every fiber of my being. Now that both gerbils have passed on, he reminded me that we have an empty aquarium just waiting for a reptile inhabitant...oh heaven help me.

After peeking at your blog this am, he very smugly announced to me from his manchair, "Well, lookey there, Melissa has gotten Olivia a snake...what a GOOD Momma she is!" C'mon, HoodMama, you are making me look bad!! small consolation for my poor husband who is NOT getting a snake...maybe you could call the new pet "Jay"??

Wes said...

Python names: Monty (I can't believe I am first in with that one), Spot, Boots (or Belt, really anything that he could one day become), Tiger (get it, he is a big snake). I'll keep thinking

Candy said...

OK! Wes beat me to it: I was going to suggest "Monty" as Trey was really into 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail' while a high school lad. (That was before his love of reptiles began.)

How in the world has he passed that love of the creepy crawly onto 3 of your 4 children? (Isn't Augustine a reptile?)

You can throw Nanny into the freaked out category too!!


Janet said...

We also had a ball python for 4 years named Monty!! Pythons are very easy pets, but the feeding.....another story entirely!! We learned to put Monty in a large rubbermaid container in the garage to feed, thinking that he would know the difference between the location where he was kept and the one where he ate...and just in case the food got loose!!

Big Mama said...

I don't know why but when you said literary characters and I saw the snake, Oliver Twist came to mind.

Get it? Because it twists.

Is it just me?

And I'm seriously glad that thing lives at your house and not mine.

Alicia said...

I love Monty!! And just a piece of advice based on experience of my husband and his college roommate. DO NOT and I mean DO NOT decide it would be cheaper to breed your own mice to feed the snake.

Casey (@ Ever-Changing Life) said...

My Uncle once had a Boa named Cuddles. I always thought that was precious and scary all at the same time. A python? I have no idea.

Traci said...

How about Watson (as in Dr. Watson) or Sherlock (sorry we just saw the movie) or Snape- you know Harry Potter, Slytherin- the whole snakey thing. Or you could just call it Lucky cause that thing sure is lucky he got to come live in your house! He he- G has begged for a snake for years- I promised him I'd buy him one when he went to college- figured it was a great way to deter girls...unless he goes to school with Olivia. :) You are my hero- how many pooping beings do you have under one roof now?

happygeek said...

Oh heavens.
Do you want to come live here? Because if a snake entered my house it better cook and clean because momma is out of here. You are a waaaay better mama than I.
Name suggestions
Old Nick
well, you get the p[picture.

Marcie said...

So I', thinking Faulkner would be a great name as far as crazy family/ crazy pets goes!

Lea said...

oh my...we absolutely part ways here. of all the things we do have in common, this (and visiting the Bush's) is definitely not one of them. sad. i suppose i could give in, too, to my boys' pleadings for a ball python, but i just can't. not yet. good grief, we just talked our daughter out of rodents and rabbits for Christmas this year! i feel like a terrible mother comparitively.
the only time i've dealt closely with one (other than the normal zoo or seeing one to touch on the streets of nyc) is when i was teaching in the inner city right there in dallas, and my fear of those kids seeing me scared outweighed my fear of snakes. but that is another story...
oh well--btw, is the corn snake still around? do you actually have TWO snakes living in your house? seriously. you are brave beyond imagination. this takes the cake.
as far as a name, i'm liking Kaa, myself b/c i love that movie. beth greenway, the gal responsible for our kids' cirric. at church, named the snake in the first grade class theme room (pond/garden of eden/etc.) slythemore. kind of cute, i suppose.
good luck with all of this. i will be praying it stays in its cage, unlike its new friend (or former roommie) the corn snake. eeeeesh. :) happy new year!

coneymama said...

I'm sorry, but as darling a little Olivia is, if she wanted to keep that snake, they would both have to move out... or mama would. This mama goes straight into panic attacks at the zoo, so my little pumpkins know not to even bring up the idea. I'll be praying for you Hoodmama...I'm with "happygeek" on this one and anyo thos names she suggeste are the way to go!

How did you end up on the naughty list?

Ellen said...

I say you name him Homer. No particular reason, it was just the first name that popped into my head. :-)

Jill said...

Funny how things girls were holding their first ball python just yesterday, and it looked just like Olivia's. So glad we left it there and we just have pics to remind us of the great "FUN". Monty is a great idea.

Jessica said...

i am so thankful both of my girls are deathly afraid of snakes!! As for the name, I'd go w Monty.

hickandlo said...

Monty, totally. We've MISSED you--call when you're up for giving up some of your peeps! xx Lauren

Karin Katherine said...

Did you ever find that other snake that got lost in your house? You are brave my dear to have these snakes in the house. I'm pretty much spent with the leopard geckos and the bearded dragons.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Bigglesworth

Grateful for Grace said...

Brazen (as in the rules have brazenly been broken)
Rebel (as in someone rebelled against the rules)