Friday, April 23, 2010

Friday morning poetry with Hoodmama.

Not very long ago, U.S. Poet Laureate, Billy Collins came to Covenant and spoke about poetry and delighted us by reading some of his.  It was awesome.  He's a great writer and hilarious and all my kids, even Sadie, were practically falling out of their seats as he read his works.

One of our favorites was "The Lanyard" and here's a little piece of it.

She gave me life and milk from her breasts,
and I gave her a lanyard.
She nursed me in many a sick room,
lifted spoons of medicine to my lips,
laid cold face-cloths on my forehead,
and then led me out into the airy light
and taught me to walk and swim,
and I, in turn, presented her with a lanyard.
Here are thousands of meals, she said,
and here is clothing and a good education.
And here is your lanyard, I replied,
which I made with a little help from a counselor.

Yesterday, I had a Lanyard kind of day.
Kind of.  With maybe some creative license.

He got an award from the mayor.  
A giant block of crystal too heavy to hold.
An honor for service and leadership.  From the city.  And the Mayor.  His new BFF.
In front of other people, he was applauded, and congratulated.
They clapped.  And fed him a nice breakfast.
There were probably cloth napkins.
And bacon.
 
  
Then, he got another award. 
Same day, count with me - that's two.
From the school district for being their 2010 Partner of the Year.
The Superintendent handed it to him.  In front of others.  More clapping.
And more cloth napkins, nice salad, probably chicken, and green beans almondine.
Definitely green beans almondine.
No bacon.  But, still.

Trey got two awards in one day.
He had to wear a suit.
A tie, and a suit.
He almost always spills - but he didn't.
He looked handsome.  And they clapped for him.

And I, who birthed four children and sometimes clean up dog poop.
Got my car broken into.


Perhaps it was the purse I left inside.
Like I live in Mayberry.

He had people shake his hand, and I have to go get a new drivers license.
It was a pretty decent picture.
I had on red lip gloss.
I can't pull that off anymore.
Odds are, this one will be less cute because, remember, the four children.
Birthed.
Plus two teenagers - one whom has prom this weekend.
Dark circles are inevitable.
And at the DPS office, let's be honest, they're not photographers.
Definitely no Barbara Walters lens.
And no photoshop.


He had his picture made by photographers.
There were probably candles on the tables.
Candles make everyone look better.

I have a car full of glass and no purse.
They didn't take the trash, just the purse.
Apparently, it stood out.
I can't find it most days.
But they could.



They also found a way to empty our checking account.
Perhaps they look like me.
With red lip gloss.

He had people wanting to meet him.
I had Sam, telling me to move my car so the new mentors that were coming for training wouldn't be scared off.
I did.  Because, I mean, look at him.
Intimidating.


So he has two new awards in his office.
They don't even have fingerprints on them.

I have a broken window, no purse, and very little cash.
And a car full of water.
Because, of course, last night.
It rained.

The End.
:)


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30 comments:

Jennifer said...

OH my - I'm sorry! I guess I won't be leaving my purse "hidden" under the seat anymore. I hope today is a better day.

little miss can't be wrong said...

i always enjoy reading your posts! i'm so glad you were able to share billy collins with your children; i adore his writing.
remember, when god closes a door somewhere he opens a window!!

The Rowlands said...

I am sooooo sorry about your car and purse...that is terrible! Love your humor in the matter~ you are a true P31 girl!
congrats to your hubby for the awards, and to you as well!!!

Becca said...

Oh no! I leave my purse and computer and such in the car all the time . . . I'm just entirely too trusting I guess - I'll probably be in for a rude awakening when i live downtown!

Traci said...

And I bet the purse was really cute too. Oh I hurt for you- that is terrible.

emily said...

Oh no, so sorry. I will call you in a bit to see if you need to use the suburban!

Lauren V. said...

I love your blog and it usually makes me laugh a lot, but this just made me sad for you. I hope you get things resolved quickly and without too much hassle. Praise God he is your rock, and not your car, purse or bank account!

Colored With Memories said...

so sorry, melissa!

congrats to trey on his awards, and the woman that stands behind him making it possible for him to do what he does!

Grateful for Grace said...

Stinkin' hilarious, I mean, sad.

Sarah Stehlik said...

:(
I keep meaning to get together with you and ask you some practical "what's safe to do in the hood" questions... I will mark leaving my purse in the car off the list.

Anonymous said...

:(
Yuck, yuck, yuck!! I had my purse and laptop stolen out of our truck in ATL. Fortunately, they didn't break the window in when they did it.
If they got access to your checking acct with a debit card, you should be able to report that and get your money back. Our thieves used mine at a nearby gas station. I, of course, thought, really?? That's the first place you went with a stolen card?? Couldn't you have done better than that?? ;) Anyhow, since I reported it stolen right after, the money was put right back in. Hope your money is as easily replaced as that. :)

Heather

sevenalstons said...

That is so terrible. I really hope you are able to get your money back. I would be devastated, but you still have your sense of humor and for that, you should be applauded (and never stolen from again) :)

happygeek said...

Oh heavens.
What a day for you.
Good thing you can retain a sense of humour even if you do not get to retain your money.

Jennifer (take the day off) said...

Man oh man. I am so sorry! I can't believe they cleared out your bank account!

Dealing with all the lost cards and IDs is a pain. And if it was my purse there would be about 8 more pounds of who knows what else that I would surely miss: coupons, starbucks cards, toothpaste, makeup, cell phone chargers, miscellaneous snacks(less of a big deal, but still!)...etc.

Again, so sorry. And mad!

Lea said...

Mucho congrats to Trey, who would not have rec'd those rewards without you--cooking all those meals, taking in extra kids and animals, raising all of them--you've got his back, girl! (I know he knows that.) He'd be nowhere without you! :) I'm so sorry about the break-in and am praying for you as you get everything replaced. Hate that you must drag in to have a new, untouched, unairbrushed pic taken at the driving place. Hope you didn't lose a lipgloss or 2 (as I would in this scenario), which comes in at a very close second to having to replace a decent driver's lic. pic! Have a great weekend!

AmyRLugo said...

Oh HoodMama~

I"m a so so sorry. I too am a hood dweller. My car got broken into for reusable publix bags. Once they saw it was publix bags and not a purse they left. Didn't take my trash either.

Props to Trey for his work.

I hope you are having a better day prom and all.
A

Misty said...

been there! i mean, not my husband getting awarded for great things...nope, the other thing! left my purse in car (covered up with a jacket!! that's safe...) and they broke my window and took it. i have since then told everyone do not leave purse in car! even for a couple of minutes. :( it stinks! great poem btw :O)

Lauren said...

oh melissa. i'm so so so so sorry. how... not ideal!

love the post, btw. always nice when you can laugh at crappy days.

hickandlo said...

The ONLY good thing about your car being broken into is that it's going to totally save you from having me come over to annihilate your house with toilet paper and peeps this weekend. I had big, big plans, believe me, but I'll let you off this time, bc that just might send you Over The Edge. I really am so sorry to hear about your car, purse, etc. See ya manana, and planning to feed the boys lots of Mountain Dew and Skittles, so no worries there. xx L

dkt said...

so sorry for you!!

Praise the Lord that your reward is in heaven where rust cannot destroy and theives cannot break in and steal!!

Praying for you!!
dianna

Henley on the Horn said...

This made me cry. You are such a godly servant. Those two awards were YOURS as well... behind every great man is a great woman and an even greater God. So pat yourself on the back even if you didn't get to have any bacon. I am so sorry and sad that the people you are there to love and minister to would break in your car for your purse. May you reap more than was ever in that purse in the first place and may God give you a day full of happiness. And, if I looked like you, I wouldn't need red lip gloss... and neither do you:) You're GORGEOUS!

These Three Kings said...

oh friend..wow!
SO sorry to hear that. I had my bank card stolen (well, I dropped out outside of one of the neighborhood stores) Apprently a drug addict found it and was using it to sell gas. You know, asking people could she purchase gas for them on a bank card and they give her cash back to support her habit.
Yes, CLEARED US OUT AS WELL!!!! LOL
We are just not getting back on our feet from that one!
I know the feeling. SO thankful for how you seem to be taking this.

Love you girly!!

Shout out to my boy Trey! LOL!!
GO HEAD TREY DOG!!! I see you getting it in for JESUS!! God is being glorifed!!!

coneymama said...

Oh girl, SO SORRY!! I have been there...car broken into 3 times, but they only ever took my work bag...which of course had all my mileage, recorded visits for the month, and oh, yes client's files...just a few weeks ago I dropped my debit card at a 7-11 in a hood in Fort Worth after I'd gotten gas...they too tried to get gas, but 7-11 takes precautions for their customers security, the Red BOX DVD's sitting outside the 7-11, yeah, not so much. I was in 76103 zip at the time which is quite close to my own...and it worked for them. How nice. They bought themselves $200 worth of DVD's...luckily the bank took care of everything! Now Hoodmama, hide that purse!

Tracy said...

I am sooooo sorry about your car, purse, license, and checking account. Praying it is all better soon.

I love the lanyard poem. A friend of ours read it at a church event once, so funny.

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

That is just about the saddest poems I have ever read in my life.

I'm so sorry.
(deep sad sigh)

Once when I was 9 months pregnant, I squatted down to look at some baby clothes at Ross - did I mention I was 9 months pregnant, squatting, at Ross - and someone reached in my purse and took my wallet. By the time I noticed they had done all their Christmas shopping at WalMart on my cards.

Does that make you feel any better in a sick simpatico way?

karen said...

At least once a week I tell my kids, aged 22 and 24, to never leave anything of value in their cars, and at least once a week they tell me back "just because it happened to you once, 36 years ago, doesn't mean it will happen to me." So this time I'll just make 'em read your blog :))

Congrats to your husband on his awards and I'm so sorry about your break-in. It's such a hassle!!!

Carly said...

So Talented! It flowed... really well. AND FULL CIRCLE!!! Go with me here-- they also must have walked away with a blue bamboo flute. I'm certain they did actually. Where else would it be?

maryflo said...

Just so sorry...lets go get something with bacon in it, and make it all better!

maryflo said...

I am just so sorry! Let's go get something with bacon and see if we can make it all better!

TDM Wendy said...

Would it be wrong to leave your hubby's awards in the front seat to see what would happen? Because I am sure it would produce great poetry. Dang those purse snatchers. Did you have a bible in it cuz then I bet they'll get saved and return your gloss to you.